Oh my blog! I have returned to the computer world today and even discovered a new thingie majig called tumblr which enables easier ways of posting. I'm giving it a shot since I will take up anything that will make my life easier at this point. Being able to have time to shower and get dressed in something that is not sliding half off my body and covering at least half of these unspeakably enormous milk producers which is productivity to the utmost repect, updating photos and managing to merge my blogs to update simultaneously is what I consider a very productive day.
Since I've entered mommyhood, I really want to keep up to date with photos, keepsakes and written updates. Unfortunately my desire is greater than my actual ability. These things have all but become another To-Do on my list which don't seem to get crossed off.
So here is a preview of the writings to be published soon:
-Julians Birth Story (Finally!)
-A List: (you know how much I like those!)Memorable Moments from arrival to departure in Lenox Hill Hospital.
-From Hospital to Home: As Reality Sinks In
-The Next Few Weeks: As Reality REALLY Begins to Sink In
- Another list, yippee: The Most Memorable(so far) Moments of Life With Julian
-Pumping and Breastfeeding: My Ups, my downs and my inability to merge my conflicting feelings of this arduous full time job.
-My Freedom: The mourning of its loss and the new deep appreciation for time for myself, my friends and my husband.
___________________________________________________________________________________
Not much has been able to get done without a list these days so seeing these posts in need of completion in writing is helpful. For now I can tell you a few things:
The last seven weeks seem like an eternity where life did not exist before Julian while at the same time all taking place in half a blinks time.
There were sweet moments of high energy and mesmerizing bliss from which I would sink deep into the depths of my new family's love.
There were moments where my new life seems like a big gray blur of timelessness and cyclical hectic monotony. These time usually follow feelings of confinement, mourn, guilt, and desire to temporarily crawl out of my skin.
Motherhood makes all your feelings run deeper. There are ups and downs that are higher and lower than anything felt before. The deepness of the love never seeped to the core so consumingly and the lows never felt more threatening.
Currently, time stands still in a race against itself. My abilities as a new person, a new Mother, are trying to keep up with the speed of light development of Julian.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment